The Relativity of Stupidity
by Passionate Cec
Summary: After Heartbreak, Gibbs goes to find Kate in the morgue and helps her with dealing with the events of the day.


The promised OS, though a little later than promised. Please forgive the wait.

This an episode post for _Heartbreak_. I hope I've managed to stay in character enough, even though, considering how tragic the situation was in that episode, I supposed it is acceptable that both Kate and Gibbs are a little OOC. Also, please keep in mind that, this is in canon with my other post-episode OS's and that, here, Kate and Gibbs are already in a relationship, which explains the dialog. =)

Special Thanks to redsneakers for helping me choose which story I should post. =)

As usual, NCIS, Kate and Gibbs don't belong to me. I make no money with this story. Its sole purpose is entertainement. No copyright infringement intended.

Don't forget to tell me what you think about this. Reviews make me very, very happy. =D

Enjoy. =)

**The Relativity of Stupidity**

As unpleasant as the thought was, Gibbs knew exactly where Kate would be. And he found her where he had gone to look for her; in the morgue, looking down at the body of the innocent boy she had shot to save him. She was leaning against the wall of fridges and didn't even notice the hiss of the door when he entered. Her face was cast down and it was too dark anyway for him to see her face but he suspected there would be tear stains on her cheeks.

Gibbs walked over to her and gently grabbed her shoulders, turning her away from the body. He promptly pushed the gurney back in and closed the door, moving around the young woman to pull her to him, her head resting against his chest, under his chin. She was practically unresponsive, letting him handle her body, neither putting up any resistance nor encouraging the actions. Her sole movement was her arms moving up and tightly grasping his shirt at his sides. He leaned back against the fridges, taking her with him and leaned his head down so his mouth was right next to her ear.

'Don't do this to yourself.' He felt Kate's grip on his shirt tighten as his hands caressed her back in long, slow, firm strokes.

'I killed him, Jethro. I killed this kid. This _innocent_ kid!' He felt her tense and pulled her closer to him. 'I killed him for no reason.' She mumbled and that was the point when he decided he had to stop her.

'Kate. You were protecting me. You saved my butt out there. You did what you had to do to save me and if you hadn't pulled that trigger we wouldn't be here to talk about it.' He paused for effect, to let what he had just said sink in. 'Would you like that better?' He added, briefly wondering whether he was pushing it.

Kate stayed unmoving in his arms until she pulled out of the embrace and backed away from him, going as far as she could get, until one of the examination tables was in the way. She moved passed it and faced away from him, just standing there, alone, lost, in the dark, in the middle of an almost empty morgue. He didn't move, simply looked at her back as her hands moved to cover her face, then threaded through her hair, completely disheveling the neatly done pony tail, and moved around to circle her own body, holding tight onto her sides. He wondered whether the action was for actual warmth or only for some sort of reassurance she obviously didn't feel like he could offer or didn't even want him to offer. Gibbs saw her body start rocking back and forth. She sniffled a few of times and then exhaled. He heard her stutter as she tried to tell him something and failed. She breathed in deeply and started talking again.

'I can't do this.'

'What? What can't you do, Katie?'

'This. You, me. Us.'

'Kate?' He had the awful feeling he knew where this was going and he didn't like it in the least. He stood stock still, fifteen feet away from her, looking at the back of her head, holding his breath.

'This never would have happened had I not wanted to protect you.'

'Kate.' She didn't respond. 'Kate, look at me.' She remained in the same position. 'Caitlin, would you please look at me?'

Gibbs moved over, grabbed her shoulders and turned her around, more forcefully and violently than he had intended. He kept a tight hold on her upper arms and looked straight into her eyes. He could see that behind the overwhelming guilt and pain, there was actually some fear. He had never physically hurt her and they both knew he never would, but he was scaring her nonetheless. He tried to forget that because he knew that softness wouldn't work at that moment.

'Tell me one thing, Caitlin. Look me in the eye and tell me that when you shot him you were thinking about us. Can you honestly do that? Can you tell me that it was me, Jethro, the man you're in a relationship with, you were thinking about? Can you tell me that it would have been different had it been DiNozzo or McGee there instead of me, that you wouldn't have pulled that trigger?'

She didn't move for a few moments, just looking straight at him, a look on her face he had never seen before and never wished to see again. They were both holding their breaths and finally she was the one to break. She closed her eyes tightly and leaned her forehead against his shoulder.

'Tell me, Katie.' He whispered into her ear, his voice softening at the fact that she wasn't pushing him back anymore.

'I can't. I can't remember. I don't know.'

'I do.'

He paused for effect, half hoping she would show some interest and actually ask him, but it seemed as if she hadn't even heard him and in a way it appeared to be the most likely scenario. Still, he knew if she wasn't already listening she would start at some point and would hear what he was going to say. So he kept going.

'You weren't thinking about us. You weren't, okay? You did what you had to do and it doesn't matter that in the end the kid wasn't a murderer or that we don't really know what he would have done. He had a gun pointed at me and he appeared to be preparing to shoot so you did the only thing you could do and it doesn't matter that it was me; you would have done the exact same thing had McGee or DiNozzo or any other agent been there instead of me. You wanna know how I know that?'

He felt her nod and smiled slightly. There was the reaction he had been wishing to get for quite some time. It didn't matter that he would have talked anyway, at least she had shown interest, and to him, that meant a lot.

'Because, Caitlin Todd, you are a good agent. You do what you have to do and you do not let your feelings intervene with your work. You're professional and there is no way you were thinking about your personal life while we were in a potentially dangerous situation. You assessed the situation and made the right call. It was the only possible option. Now I want you to get over it. I want you to stop thinking about it because you did _nothing_ wrong. You hear me?' Again he felt her nod. 'Good.'

Gibbs finally relaxed his grip on her arms, wondering for a minute whether he had actually hurt her and would leave bruises on her pale skin. He moved one hand to the back of her neck, the other one to the small of her back. He kissed her temple and felt her tense, though she didn't move away and he once more considered that a good thing. Small steps were the key in such situations.

'This is still a bad idea, you know?' Kate whispered against his shoulder.

'Does it really feel bad to you?' She shook her head.

'No, but you're the one with that stupid rule.' He chuckled and held her closer.

'I know. But there's a French saying which says only the idiot doesn't change his mind.' She laughed and he smiled having achieved his goal to lift her mood.

'Just because I didn't kill the kid because I love you doesn't mean it won't happen in the future. One day I might do something irrational because you're there and I think you're in danger or vice versa. What then?'

'I don't know. But we'll bear the brunt of the consequences, we'll make decisions.'

'But it will be too late; the damage will have been done. What if people die because of our feelings?'

'Those are only suppositions, it might never happen, it will probably never happen. I don't want you off my team, Kate, we work well together and we have never let our feelings for each other cloud our judgment, I'm confident we can keep it that way. And honestly, even if we broke up, my feelings for you won't stop from one day to another. It would probably only be worse because I wouldn't know what I'm missing. Can you tell me that you don't feel the same?' She shook her head again. 'Good.' They were silent for a while, only holding on to each other. 'Wanna go home?' She nodded and slowly pulled back. 'Alright, let's go then.'

He grabbed her hand and led her towards the exit, only letting go of her once the elevator reached their floor and there was the risk of someone seeing them. They grabbed their things and moved back to the machine. Once inside he grabbed her smaller hand again and looked at her.

'You know, I wasn't lying about that saying.' He stated. She looked up and smiled. He leaned down and kissed her once, softly and chastely, before the doors opened and they separated to walk to their respective car.


End file.
